Marriage Anniversary or Marriage Faithfulness, Which one comes First?

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By Godday Odidi

Recently, I had a very long conversation with a very well-exposed and educated young lady at her 30s and she boldly told me that 99.9% of men are unfaithful to their marriages. I paused a bit and I was trying to counter such allegation that at least 30% of men are still faithful to their marriages till date. She told me most men are not faithful including acclaimed servants of God.

To me, I thought a demon was speaking through this young lady to destroy men of virtues like us. This article will not go well with so many men that are guilty conscience of unfaithfulness in marriage. We need to say the bitter truth of marriage now. We often celebrate marriage anniversary of many years but faithfulness is totally absent from this celebration always.

Marriage is a choice and every man has every right to choose his wife that suites him in life. I’ m not here to quote scripture for you because the demon also quotes scriptures too. If a man truly loves his wife what makes him looks for other women outside.Again, recently a man was beaten up by a serving military officer for sleeping with his wife which went viral on the social media. Some regions in Nigeria, women are forbidden to sleep with men outside their matrimonial homes. It is a taboo but some regions, it is normal. In some regions or biblical injunctions, if the woman’s husband dies, the woman is entitled to marry again likewise the man too.

I’ m not here to preach religion. Some religions allow men to marry more than one wife as far he can care for them. I m particularly concern on men like us that is hooked with one wife and yet still goes out to look for beautiful faces to put their marriages at stake. Everybody seems to be celebrating marriage anniversary but how many men can boast of marriage faithfulness in life? That is, since I got married to my wife for 5yeears, 10years, 20years or 30years, I had never slept with any other woman in my life. If the woman is faithful in her marriage, then the man must follow suit too. No doubt, so many women are also unfaithful in their marriages.

Marriage is an institution created by God for every man or woman to enjoy fruitfulness in life. Several posts on the social media always crucifying women only than men. Does that mean men will not be punished for infidelity or unfaithfulness in marriage?

Five years ago, I went for my brother’s marriage at Imo State, during the prayers for the marriage rite, the anchor prayed like this “If the woman goes out for another man outside the marriage, Holy Ghost fire will burn her but if the man goes out in a tight schedule for official assignment and he cannot return on the same day and sleeps in an hotel with another woman, God will forgive him? It means that this prayer is only encouraging men to be unfaithful in their marriages and nothing more.

Though, there are many factors making many men to be unfaithful in their marriages now. Many we say immediately, a woman start producing children, she becomes second-hand product likewise the man is also second-hand product too. Delay in child bearing and other factors leading to infidelity. The issue is that some women remain unkempt immediately children start coming in and prefer to love their children more than their husbands. I met an advanced woman in my area of resident few years ago that has 5 children even having a grandchild told me that she is not interested in love again with her husband, she is old. She is in her early 50s and definitely the man will be looking for alternative to satisfy his sexual urges outside.  

As the woman gets older so as the man gets older too.”If yes I do must exist till eternity, then our marriages must be protected always. Infidelity in marriages have destroyed many homes either the income or happiness of the marriage. Marriage is from two separate backgrounds that must align themselves with the new school of thought in marriage principles. That is why today, nobody has ever graduated with a certificate in marriage because it is learning process that ends in eternity.

Some said once a man becomes wealthy, you will know whether he can portray faithfulness in marriage again. Money and fame another factors making men to be playing with God in their lives. So many rich people coming down today were caused by infidelity not one witch or wizard in their villages.

My candid advice for us all men, we must create apple time with our wives at home and demonstrate the kind of love will show when we met them at the first sight. Every woman has the same private part and nothing is so special about outside marriage. During my marriage counseling for three months, the pastor that wedded me said if you notice any secret relationship that will jeopardize your marriage, quickly alerts your wife for prayers but if you conceal it to yourself, the unknown will happen immediately. To me, I said a handsome man like me see a woman admiring me, what concerns my wife again for this matter? Little did I know that my counselor was hitting the nail on my head against infidelity in marriage? A lot of infidelities were caused by men hiding their secret relationships or admirers from their wives. It is sweet when committing sin but kills faster than HIV/Aids. There many powers in errands to destroy many homes in marriages now, so, it is time for both partners to remain faithful to themselves.   


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